I feel his core close to mine
The layers of fabric do nothing to stop the pulsation
My body screams, “OH! It’s been so long”
My spirit says, “NO! You have to stay strong”
My heart is silent, confused about what it feels
My head is certain this is going no place but downhill
My core is humming
My nips are thumping
My back is arching
Scratch that, my back is arched
My eyes are glistening
I say to him, “please stop”
He says to me, “you don’t sound convincing”
I try again, “PLEASE stop”
He asks, “Do you really want me to?”
He doesn’t wait for a reply
He gets up and leaves
I start to cry
As I roll down my sleeves
The throbbing stills
The thumping takes a cue
I think I hear my flesh cursing
But I’m sure I hear my spirit singing
This was me in April, and all the while a soft voice kept whispering over & over again….
I adjure you, O! Olatanwa [maidens of Jerusalem ] , Omo Babasanya, Seni-Hughes
by the gazelles yes, by all the wild deer of the open fields:
Do not awaken or arouse LOVE until it pleases!
There must be a reason this instruction appears three times in the book of Songs of Solomon…
UPDATE, Nov 24, 2013: It has become my custom to re-read all my posts and most times, I find something to tweak. Today I bumped into another passage that speaks to the Heart of this Matter.
“Run from anything that stimulates youthful lusts.
Instead, pursue righteous living, faithfulness, love, and peace.
Enjoy the companionship of those who call on the Lord with pure hearts.” 2Timothy 2;22
I have a friend who ran away and it drove me mad.
I’m not sure he had read this particular scripture before he ran, but this passage gives a bit of clarity.
Have you ever been in this kind of situation or something similar?
How did you handle it?